Monday, June 18, 2007

Results and Answers

I just want to thank everyone again for being so supportive of our blog. Rich & I are such private people & don’t really share what is going on, so this is a huge step for us. It is so great to do this though & talk about it out in the open. It feels like we are more validated now & maybe more people will understand what we IFers go through. I am so glad I decided to open up & talk about my angels and the rough path we have been on. My therapist will be so proud of me for writing this all down & talking to people about everything we have been through. She always tells me she is shocked we never talk about it & most people had no idea what was going on.

So after the D&C we were just waiting on results from all the testing. Testing was done on the baby for any chromosome abnormalities. Dr. B also wanted to have testing done on Rich & I. Rich had his chromosomes tested. I had my chromosomes tested along with anti-bodies & blood testing. Dr. B seemed to think it was an immune disorder that was rejecting the babies. Turns out he was right, he is a smart guy.

Rich had 1 vial of blood taken, I had 8!!!!! Luckily they had warned me beforehand to eat & drink before giving all the blood. Besides the fact we had to wait 1.5 hrs before they even got to us. We went later thinking all of the fasting people would go first, no such luck. Anyway these were done about 1 month after the miscarriage.

So now we are at the point we are just waiting for results. Waiting & waiting so more. I feel like that is all we ever do sometimes and I get impatient & tired of it. But this time we just wanted some answers hopefully that would explain what was happening to us. I actually wanted something to be wrong with me, that could easily be fixed, that would explain the losses. I got my wish.

Rich & I are normal chromosome wise. I have anti-phospholipid syndrome. Big words for a blood clotting disorder. Dr. B personally called to tell me the results. He said that since I had three factors elevated; platelet, protime & clotting time I will be on Heparin shots twice a day throughout any pregnancies. Since I had three out of whack, I will be on it the entire time. We just recently saw the results in black & white and many of the results were very elevated. Dr. B said that with the syndrome I have natural killer cells attacked the babies as foreign, kind of like with an organ transplant that is rejected. He said there is an 80-90% of losing babies without Heparin & with Heparin I have a 70-80% of carrying to term, same as anyone else. Yes!!!!! Finally an answer and an explanation for the losses. It wasn’t just a freak thing or just a chromosome abnormality.

So, prior to the blood results we had gotten the results of the baby sent off for testing. That was probably about 2 weeks after the D&C. Rich & I had discussed if we wanted to know the sex of the baby since I knew we would be able to do that. Rich didn’t want to know, but I did. He thought that would make this angel more special than the first one. We just didn’t have that choice at that time. In the end, I chickened out & decided I didn’t want to know. I thought it would make it harder if I knew & if we never had a boy or girl later would I feel worse. Dr. B decided differently. He told me before I got the chance to say anything. Chromosome normal girl. I now have found out that sometimes they can test the mother’s tissue instead of the baby’s but in my gut I think that the results are right. Besides we have to go with the information we have right now. We should be having a daughter in September. Instead we have an angel in heaven looking out for us with her brother or sister. We have an angel in heaven named Autumn.


MrsSpock said...

Now if I can only get my half-Vulcan husband to express the same emotions...;)

Val, Adam, Meadow, and Ollie said...

Ok, you're not supposed to have me crying at work, Jenn!